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Other Emotional Issues


Uncontrollable grief resolved with EFT

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.

Hi Everyone,

Arinda Davis shows us how she neutralized extreme grief with EFT. Very useful article and I make a helpful suggestion near the end.

Hugs, Gary

By Arinda Davis

Hi Gary,

I’m a newcomer to EFT, and I’ve had some pretty impressive results now that I’ve practiced and cleared some issues that had impeded progress.  I would like to relate one of the specific issues I’ve cleared because it was so fast and amazing to me that after having this issue all my life it suddenly feels so different.

Recently I decided to read the paper in the twenty minutes before I had to leave for work.  While perusing the obituaries, I saw the picture of an old friend who I hadn’t seen for several years.  He had been my best friend, but due to his own personal demons, we had parted company. 

I immediately called his ex-wife.  She had been trying to get hold of me but our phone number isn’t listed.  We talked, cried, and shared some memories.  I agreed to help her with plans for his memorial service, but I could see that I was going to have a very difficult time with my grief. 

Being empathic, I’m a total loss at funerals, or around anyone’s grief for that matter.  Being in a room full of sad people overwhelms me.  In fact, I wasn’t sure how I was going to make it at work that day.  I couldn’t stop crying.  I decided to go to work anyway and use EFT in the car on the way.  It takes me about 15 minutes to get there and I tapped all the way.  I tapped on:

Even though I’m no good at funerals…

Even though I can’t handle my grief…

Even though grief overwhelms me…

And then I started using the choices method:

Even though I’ve never been able to handle grief before, I now choose to allow it to flow through me and I am calm, collected and healthy.

Even though in the past I’ve been overwhelmed by grief, I now choose to handle it calmly and in a healthy way.

I continued on with different variations on this basic theme as they occurred to me for several minutes.  I didn’t have time to craft perfect set up statements - I just had to speak off the top of my head.  But I’ve discovered that, for me, this sometimes allows the perfect words to come up uncensored.  It worked this time.  Shortly into the process, I felt the grief drain away and peace took its place.  By the time I got to work, I was happy and smiling.  I could think of his picture and the name above it, which would have sent me into spasms of crying before, with a smile and the joy of knowing that he truly is finally at peace, himself.  I worked the whole day without crying, or even showing that I was upset.

I do tear up when I think about it, but it’s not the uncontrollable feeling that carried me away in the past.  It’s the normal, healthy grief one would expect to feel.  It’s a huge gift to me, though.  I can’t tell you how wonderful it is to experience something and not be overcome with emotions that rule my life.  Before, I felt at the mercy of whatever emotions were elicited by a person or situation, but now I find myself at peace most of the time as I clear, one by one, the core beliefs I learned in my lifetimes on this planet.

GC COMMENT: For even greater efficiency, one can reduce past grief/overwhelm issues into specific events and use EFT on them one by one. This uproot foundational issues that can have even longer lasting, deeper effects.

Thank you again for your tireless work in bringing the gift of EFT to the world.

In love and light, Arinda Davis


Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.