- Other Emotional Issues
- Anger Management
- Getting over a gang rape--including a follow-up
- EFT alleviates horrendous self-hatred and rage
- Calming down Teddy, an emotionally disturbedboy
- EFT for anger underlying ALS
- Releasing anger at parents allowed healing of ulcerative colitis and headaches
- Suppressed anger expelled via the stomach
- EFT for self righteous anger
- Intuitional work with anger
- A First Class use of Surrogate EFT for Bill's anger and behavior issues
- EFT Transforms "hopping-mad" anger
- An unusual anger release
- Anger in a homeless shelter
- A murderous rage is calmed with EFT
- Josh: Building rapport with children--anger & behavior problems.
- EFT for anger helps both Ann and her angry husband--note the surrogate approach
- Unbearable hatred toward classmates
- Anger and Hostility are Proven to Damage Lungs; Simple Acupressure Technique Offers a Solution
- Anger case history from a client
- EFT for workplace anger
- EFT and severe mental illness--a murderous impulse
- An interesting approach to EFT and road rage
- Using EFT for on-the-spot "hopping mad" anger
- Surrogate EFT for fighting neighbors
- Brandon's Story--anger problem becomes history: (including an update at the end)
- EFT for deep seated anger
- EFT resolves long term resentment
- The EFT Cooling Tower Technique for Letting off Steam
- Anger management approach for a polarity responder
- The cause of our anger isn't always as it appears
- A client talks about her abusive childhood and her relief via EFT
- Resentments relieved 22 years after a poor birthing experience
- Stubborn anger issue falls to 0 with emphatic "say what you feel" wording.
- Road Rage and hives disappear in one session after getting to the core issue
- Press Release: Can a One-Minute Anger Management Technique Reduce Injury Risk and Chronic Illness?
- Releasing anger patterns with EFT
- A client resolves lifelong anger on her own
- Clearing anger and self loathing with EFT via introduction to inner child
- School Counselor on anger and tension,
- Getting behind a successful EFT anger case
- New Technique Helps Avoid Heart Damage by Diffusing Anger Within Marital Arguments
- The client who continually felt resentful
- Employee overcomes anger at supervisor
- Jonas uses EFT for deeper meditation - dangerous PSA reading is now only 0.4
- Using EFT to self-calm an intense anger tantrum
- Useful thoughts on anger by Stewart Robertson
- Football Star Uses New Acupressure Technique to Calm his Road Rage -- No Drugs Needed
- Transgender person with abusive mother relieves rage with EFT
- Anger case--the urge to explode
- Even dropping the kids off at school provides tapping opportunities - an anger issue
- A successful but involved depression case--"I don't want to tell you how well I'm doing"
- EFT resolves 12 years of postnatal depression
- What was REALLY causing Anne's depression?
- EFT student eases his wife's suicidal thoughts
- Louella: Depression, pesticides and low blood sugar
- Surrogate tapping and its effect on depression.
- Persistent EFT by Email on depression, anger and anxiety
- Cross dressing, sexuality and depression
- Long term severe depression gone in ten minutes
- Jaqui Crooks used EFT to overcome her Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
- Maggie eliminates her own depression
- A textbook depression case--a "one minute wonder" complete with belief changes
- Approaching Depression with the Tearless Trauma Technique
- After 15 years of therapy, including shock therapy, EFT helps release depression
- A case that didn't work--and some suggestions
- A first class look at using EFT for a complex case - depression, guilt, grief and abandonment
- Was it really a manic/depressive disorder?
- Depression with numerous underlying issues
- Major results for anxiety, depression and social issues from one thorough EFT session and consistent EFT "homework"
- Success with a skeptical, depressed scientist - follow up included
- Depression, low self esteem and childhood traumas
- Persistence and a challenging case - Incest, abuse, depression, anxiety attacks, nightmares and flashbacks
- A mis-diagnosed manic/depressive disorder
- Newbie uses EFT on depression, allergic reactions and more
- Hair loss and facial blemishes fade after EFT relieves important emotional issues -- Depression too!
- Adrienne, a physician
- Gary discusses depression and some new ideas
- A non-therapist does superb work on depression--including her own.
- Press Release: New Method for Depression Often Works When Nothing Else Will
- 30+ years of depression gone in 2 minutes
- EFT saves a life by rapidly resolving suicidal depression
- Depression and confusion about God
- EFT on personal depression--"I was angry at myself"
- Depression Drugs and Migraine Drugs Don't Always Do The Job
- Dr. Patricia Carrington on depression--a detailed discussion, including meds
- Depression, height phobia and claustrophobia eliminated in one session
- Depression related to guilt
- When depression comes from a related issue
- EFT instead of shock treatments?
- From depressed and suicidal ... to ... "I laugh all the time
- Depression on Death Row
- EFT Newcomer eliminates his own deep depression and anxiety disorder
- An intimate look at Depression
- Panic And Anxiety
- Getting to the core of "Mark's" anxiety
- EFT for overeating and panic attacks
- Performance anxiety at a music camp
- Gayla uses EFT for panic
- Travel Anxiety--using the Tell the Story Technique
- Febrile convulsions and related panic attacks subside--not one attack in the two years since she learned to use EFT
- Successful surrogate tapping for surgery anxiety
- Persistence and Panic Attacks - Quality results on a stubborn issue
- Husband relieves wife of major panic attack
- EFT newcomer rids himself of social anxiety
- Relief for another stress related cough
- Using EFT for panic when nobody is around
- New Method for Treating Anxiety Works When Conventional Treatments Fail
- Clearing social anxiety with EFT
- Two surrogate tapping cases: Dental anxiety and severe stomach ache
- Panic Attacks: Getting behind the thought process
- Current "in your face" anxiety and stress case
- EFT makes good progress with panic, agoraphobia and feeling like a failure
- Detective work crucial in relief for panic attacks
- Combining EFT with the Inner Theater approach for panic attacks
- Testing your EFT work: Feeling trapped and panic attacks
- A Quality "How To Do It" Session for Fear and Anxiety
- Diagnosed as a schizophrenic, Gregoire had anxiety, stress and insomnia
- Medical school test anxiety--from C's and D's to A's and B's
- Success story with 10 day anxiety attack
- Sports anxiety, heat sensitivity, being away from home, loneliness, fear of insects.
- 20 year old abduction anxiety calmed with EFT
- Collapsing a client's anxiety from the 9/11 disaster--with 4 year follow-up
- Anxiety and the fear of being alone
- EFT student uses tapping to immediately calm down after a major car accident
- Using EFT for a client who feels out of control.
- One EFT round with Deborah's daughter relieves performance anxiety
- Surgery anxiety and EFT
- EFT helps adult learners overcome school and math anxiety
- EFT on a case of extreme separation anxiety in a dog and the importance of Core Issues for Animals
- Study Shows Simple Drug-Free Acupressure Technique Reduces Dental Anxiety
- Detective work provides help for an anxiety disorder
- Imagination tapping on the finger points reduces stress level to zero
- Newcomer uses EFT to collapse his own panic-attacks and writes letter to "Quackwatch"
- A detailed panic attack case
- Eric Robins, MD and Lisa Cox on surgery anxieties
- Severe anxiety client has his life back
- EFT Newbie resolves her own major trip anxiety
- Panic attacks and heart palpitations subside after doing EFT on dreams
- Anxiety, eating and more
- Success in neutralizing unwanted memories without the client disclosing the content
- One EFT phone session resolves driving test anxiety -- and the benefits expand
- Panic attacks and fear of darkness
- Addressing Generalized Anxiety Disorder by aiming EFT at specific events
- Non-therapist relieves stress in the form of a temper tantrum
- EFT for panic attacks
- Who Would Have Thought That Acupressure Could Relieve Social Anxiety Better Than Drugs or Therapy?
- Daddy left me. Will my new boyfriend leave me too?
- Courtroom anxiety AND anxiety about calling employers
- Daily tapping for Panic Attacks
- Anxiety related to atrial fibrillation is calmed with EFT
- Performance anxiety and many aspects
- EFT brings relief for trauma, anxiety, and an overactive bladder, all in less than an hour
- Test anxiety
- Using EFT for Social Anxiety Disorder
- Surgeon Uses New Acupressure Technique to Lower Surgery Risk
- Overcoming Test Anxiety with New Drug-Free Technique: 80% Success Rate
- OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
- A grief case with many aspects
- Uncontrollable grief resolved with EFT
- Attorney helps client by using EFT for long term unresolved grief
- Relieving grief over the death of Higgins the dog
- When certain music triggers grief and sadness
- Freedom from grief in only 15 minutes
- Using EFT for Bereavement
- EFT turns grief into beauty
- EFT eliminates unnecessary grief emotions and softens the grieving process - includes 2 month follow up
- EFT brings healing to a whole family while one woman heals her grief
- Community relief from grief with EFT
- This new Widow was helped in many ways by EFT
- EFT for grief and pet loss
- Getting to important emotions by doing EFT while looking in the mirror
- Tapping through grief leads to incredible insight and relief
- EFT for pain and grief for a birth mother who wasn't allowed to see her child -- a touching story with a happy ending
- An easy grief case with an aspect that showed up later
- Imaginary tapping sends grief away
- EFT setup statements for grief
- Fresh grief and a double benefit.
- Grief changes to smiles
- EFT may be a great relief to grief-stricken nurses who lose patients
- Using EFT to improve a relationship
- EFT, One Minute Wonders and Opening to Love
- EFT by telephone smoothes out a tense family reunion
- Insights into picking up another person
- EFT heals a broken heart in rapid time
- Relationships, EFT and Spirituality
- Improve relationships by Tapping in the Positive
- Using EFT for relationship issues--a detailed case
- Tapping on relationship issues
- Interesting way to use EFT & Tappy Bear for a broken heart
- "I didn't like kissing my wife after she drank coffee."
- Jack improves his relationship with his grandson using surrogate EFT
- Addressing relationship and family issues by tapping on photographs
- Tapping into a state of Love
- EFT resolves a 10 year heartbreak
- Relationship Issue: "My husband was being a jerk"
- Using EFT to prepare for a difficult encounter
- How clearing an intense cough led to improved family relationships--an EFT two-for-one EFT benefit
- MD introduces an innovative idea that brings relief for stubborn relationship issue
- Finding the love you want by healing the inner child
- Relationship issue: A humorous approach
- What holds you back from your lover?
- EFT is instrumental in bringing a couple back together
- Relationships - on "Being Right"
- Instant relationship fix?
- Using EFT for a Broken Heart
- The Healing Power of Forgiveness
- Love, Intuition, Patience and EFT help a schizophrenic 15 year old.
- EFT for Couples
- Combining role playing with EFT for relationships and other issues
- Relationship success after finding core issue
- EFT to heal family relationships
- Using EFT on "blocking thoughts" to good relationships
- Surrogate EFT heals a broken heart for a 16 year old boy
- Retired Stanford professor fixes his wife's computer with EFT
- Shared tapping provides benefits for relationship issues
- EFT Instead of the psych ward after a relationship breaks up
- Taking relationships work to a new level--The Odd Couple
- EFT and meditation for a broken heart
- EFT for love pain
- Reframes (seeing things differently) for guilt, shame and sorrow
- Restless leg syndrome linked to guilt - 20 years of restlessness gone in 2 sessions
- How to reduce guilt via an EFT "Tapping Circle" -- keeping privacy for everyone
- The "Tapping the System" Technique
- The Rolling EFT process
- Using EFT for unnecessary guilt - Did EFT get someone's husband to cook dinner?
- How Guilt and Shame Block the Law of Attraction
- Stubborn guilt finally subsides after doing a search on our website and DVDs for ideas
- EFT and infertility
- A bout of cystitis turns out to be a bout of guilt
- Writing a letter
- New Acupressure Discovery Reduces Stress 4 Ways: 80% Success Rate
- Many Stressed Women Abandon Healthy Lifestyle Habits: Simple Acupressure Technique Offers a Solution
- To Physicians: New Discoveries in Acupressure Promise Everything From Alertness to Pain and Stress Management
- A new do-it-yourself approach to acupressure alleviates stress and, in turn neutralizes cold, flu an
- Psychotherapy Dramatically Improved By New 'Acupuncture Without Needles' Technique
- Eating Disorders
- Two Year Bulimia Problem Gets Major Assist in One Hour
- A Bulimia "one session wonder"
- Bulimia in Brazil
- "Acceptance Tapping" - A powerful EFT treatment variation for severe compulsive disorders and bulimia.
- Joe resolves his Anorexia...and more
- Love, diligence and an eating disorder
- Michal describes what it is like to be free from an eating disorder
- Anger Management
EFT alleviates horrendous self-hatred and rage
Note: This is one of 3,000 articles written prior to the updated Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tapping Tutorial™. It provides practical uses for EFT Tapping and most EFT'ers should find it very helpful. However, if your benefits are temporary or a more in-depth approach is needed, you are urged to (1) consult The Gold Standard EFT Tapping Tutorial, (2) Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT, by reading our free e-book, The Unseen Therapist, and/or (3) get help from a Certified EFT Practitioner.
Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.
Our prisons are filled with people that have ongoing self-hatred and rage and domestic violence often comes from a similar cause. Fortunately, EFT can bring peace to these issues and Zoe Zimmerman shows us how. She says, "I've never seen such a huge transformation in someone's personality and such quick dissolving of huge swaths of trauma so quickly."
In my several years exclusively using EFT with clients, I've seen many amazing things, but I think this is the most amazing and quick client transformation I've ever experienced. Recently, "Samuel" (not his real name) came to me because he was going through the latest of a number of recurring episodes of extreme self-hatred, rage at everything and everyone, and thoughts that he should alienate his wife of many years so that she would kick him out and he could kill himself.
As he described himself, it became clear that his world view and actions were typical of people who had grown up in the outcast role in their families: they are told and shown that they are "wrong" in some way and that they don't "belong" in their families. They internalize this and learn to hate their families, themselves and the world. They feel compelled to act out either verbally or in actions to alienate themselves from their families and from any group of which they become a part. It's a horrible life, full of anxiety and pain.
As soon as Samuel came into my office, he began to go into detail about a number of horrendous childhood stories of physical abuse at the hands of his mother and watching helplessly as she was beaten and sometimes almost killed by a series of boyfriends. He experienced her as believing and acting as if he were worthless, purposely bringing on her own beatings by boyfriends, and told me that she was a raging alcoholic from the age of 17. He told me he despised her and hated her so much that, when his sister asked him to come to his mother's funeral, he told her "You don't want me to do that because I'll spit on her grave."
He also spoke of making veiled threats to kill his sister, of having fantasies of how good it would be to kill her husband, and of just recently smashing expensive equipment, without which he couldn't work, because he was angry at a colleague. He told me sarcastically that the colleague was "playfully" punching him in the arm and showed me how he perceived it in his anger by taking his fist and suddenly smashing it into the arm of my couch with all his strength-admitting after a moment that his colleague probably didn't do it that hard.
Finally, he felt that, for his wife's sake, he should alienate her so that she would leave him and he could "blow my brains out." (He did say that he didn't think he'd actually do that) He felt that he was too awful to be with. Nevertheless, she had, for some reason, been with him for 30 years, and loved him to this day. I suggested there might be some good things about him. He said that she tells him he has love in his heart and that he brings joy to people-none of which he was feeling right then. I knew that I somehow needed to help him feel that he belonged again. We started tapping,
Even though I feel worthless and I want to retreat from society, I acknowledge this about myself and I realize that my wife loves me and feels I belong with her. (He couldn't say he accepted himself or that he has compassion for himself). This lightened things a bit. He couldn't tell me an intensity number.
He said that his wife loves him because, in her view, he thinks of other people and that he's generous. He said that he never thinks of himself. For example, when he did a free-lance job with three other people, he divided their pay into three parts and gave them each a third, forgetting that he needed some money himself. Then we tapped on:
Even though I feel worthless and want to retreat...
Even though I never think of myself and I leave myself out, I acknowledge this about myself.
He began to cry really hard, and I tapped on him, suggesting that he just stay with what was happening. I repeated similar phrases (above) and, when he could, in between crying, he repeated them. I added, "maybe I don't need to keep leaving myself out; maybe I can think of myself."
After a short time, the crying calmed and he looked much softer. He said that he felt much lighter and that the above were completely new ideas to him.
A few days later, Samuel came for a second session. He said that since our first session he continued to feel increasingly lighter and that, interestingly, a problem he'd had since he was in a car accident 1-1/2 years ago had gotten better, too. He had been hit in the head with a metal object that flew forwards from the back seat of the car and since then, he had had trouble forming words and sentences. He noted that since our last session, his head was clearer and his sentences were clearer. And when his wife called him one day to see how he was doing, he told her "I feel good." As far back as he could recall, he had never felt good nor told anyone he was feeling good-even after being in therapy for around 35 years.
He also said that he understands his mother was very sick and that he feels mostly pity for her. This was very different from the hatred and disgust he was expressing in the first session.
In this second session, we worked through one of the most horrible events of his childhood, which he had related with great negative intensity during the first session. We gave the event a name-"Belt"-and started with the Tearless Trauma Technique which started at a level of intensity of 10 on a scale of 0 to 10.
Even though I have this "Belt" memory.
After one or two rounds, he said he felt like he was floating above the experience, and that he had more perspective. He was looking down on it instead of being in it. Now he guessed that the intensity would be a 1 or so if he went into details of the incident. Then I asked him for emotions surrounding the event. He said he was angry at his sister, at a 10 out of 10 level of intensity.
Even though I'm angry at my sister for _______, I send my young self compassion.
Even though I'm angry at my sister for _______, I forgive myself for whatever I contributed to this "Belt" event and, so that I can get some release and relief, I forgive my sister for what she did to contribute to it. I understand she may have just been trying to survive in her own way.
After this, intensity was already at 1 or 2 out of 10. He realized that what was left in intensity was because this memory was being fused together with all the other painful things that had happened while they lived in a specific house.
Even though I still have some of this anger toward my sister, and this memory is fusing together with all the other ones in that house, I choose to separate this memory out from all the others, I send my young self compassion and love, and I give myself permission to let heal from this memory. This brought the anger toward his sister to a 0.
Then I asked him about anger toward his mother. This had already gone to a 1 or 2, without directly working on it.
Then we started on the actual abusive actions that his mother perpetrated on him (I'm not saying what they are, to protect readers from vicariously having to experience them). Again the intensity for the pain was 10 out of 10.
Even though I remember how much it hurt and how anything I said was ignored...
Even though I felt so helpless because nothing I said stopped it, I send compassion to my young self and let him know I love him. I forgive myself for anything I did to contribute to this _______ and I forgive my mother. She was ill and had a lot of pain in herself. She was probably doing the best she could, given her background and life-experiences. Her best wasn't good at all, but it was the best she could do.
He agreed with all of this. He said that the thinking and feeling part of him, which had been disconnected, now felt connected. Intensity was very low, 1 or 2. He realized that his mother probably needed more love in her life, and felt understanding, pity and compassion for her. And for himself.
Now he was thinking that it was amazing that he had survived so long without harming others, and, that it was just "unfortunate" to have gone through what she did to him. He said this feeling had no charge at all.
We went to another part of the memory that had been very intense when he told it in the first session. He felt "neutral" about it. Then I had him tell the whole story out loud again in detail, and he stayed at a 0 intensity about it. He told me that, in the many years he had been in therapy, nothing had really changed for him. And in two sessions, he felt completely different. He also said he had never felt any forgiveness toward his mother, and he had certainly never expressed forgiveness toward her to anyone. But now he totally felt it. He felt totally calm about the above incident, and released from the pain.
In the next session, we worked on another event, which already had much lower intensity than it had had when he told it to me the first day. The only place that was still a sticking point was a 10 intensity regarding his bad feelings about himself in regard to feeling anger. After tapping, he was able to accept his anger and create a distinction between feeling anger-which is what he does, and acting out with violence, which his mother and her boyfriends regularly did. This was the first time, he said, that he was able to accept himself and his feelings of anger and rage without feeling that he would become just like them. A huge relief for him.
At the beginning of the fourth session, he said that he had been able, since the last session, to stop negative thoughts whenever they wanted to start.
He had never been able to do that; before this, as soon as dark thoughts began, he would be compelled to obsess on them for a long time. He said he had been feeling really good since the last session-very unusual for him in the past. I brought up several incidents connected with his mother that he had told me in the first session with such great intensity. Only one had more than a 1 or 2 intensity-it was a 3. We worked on the one aspect of this incident with somewhat of a charge and got it down to a 0 in one round.
As I said before, this is amazing to me. I've worked with a number of people who have had several discrete painful or traumatic incidents in their lives and they were resolved in one or two sessions. And I've worked, and continue to work with, people who have had years of abuse or other painful experiences and we chip away at them gradually. I've never seen such a huge transformation in someone's personality and such quick dissolving of huge swaths of trauma so quickly.
Working with Samuel fills me with immense gratitude to Gary for his development of EFT. I would have to say it verges on the miraculous at times.
FOR MORE EFT HELP ...
Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT, by reading our free e-book, The Unseen Therapist.