- Other Emotional Issues
- Anger Management
- Getting over a gang rape--including a follow-up
- EFT alleviates horrendous self-hatred and rage
- Calming down Teddy, an emotionally disturbedboy
- EFT for anger underlying ALS
- Releasing anger at parents allowed healing of ulcerative colitis and headaches
- Suppressed anger expelled via the stomach
- EFT for self righteous anger
- Intuitional work with anger
- A First Class use of Surrogate EFT for Bill's anger and behavior issues
- EFT Transforms "hopping-mad" anger
- An unusual anger release
- Anger in a homeless shelter
- A murderous rage is calmed with EFT
- Josh: Building rapport with children--anger & behavior problems.
- EFT for anger helps both Ann and her angry husband--note the surrogate approach
- Unbearable hatred toward classmates
- Anger and Hostility are Proven to Damage Lungs; Simple Acupressure Technique Offers a Solution
- Anger case history from a client
- EFT for workplace anger
- EFT and severe mental illness--a murderous impulse
- An interesting approach to EFT and road rage
- Using EFT for on-the-spot "hopping mad" anger
- Surrogate EFT for fighting neighbors
- Brandon's Story--anger problem becomes history: (including an update at the end)
- EFT for deep seated anger
- A client talks about her abusive childhood and her relief via EFT
- Resentments relieved 22 years after a poor birthing experience
- EFT resolves long term resentment
- The EFT Cooling Tower Technique for Letting off Steam
- Anger management approach for a polarity responder
- The cause of our anger isn't always as it appears
- A client resolves lifelong anger on her own
- Clearing anger and self loathing with EFT via introduction to inner child
- Stubborn anger issue falls to 0 with emphatic "say what you feel" wording.
- Road Rage and hives disappear in one session after getting to the core issue
- Press Release: Can a One-Minute Anger Management Technique Reduce Injury Risk and Chronic Illness?
- Releasing anger patterns with EFT
- Employee overcomes anger at supervisor
- Jonas uses EFT for deeper meditation - dangerous PSA reading is now only 0.4
- School Counselor on anger and tension,
- Getting behind a successful EFT anger case
- New Technique Helps Avoid Heart Damage by Diffusing Anger Within Marital Arguments
- The client who continually felt resentful
- Anger case--the urge to explode
- Even dropping the kids off at school provides tapping opportunities - an anger issue
- Using EFT to self-calm an intense anger tantrum
- Useful thoughts on anger by Stewart Robertson
- Football Star Uses New Acupressure Technique to Calm his Road Rage -- No Drugs Needed
- Transgender person with abusive mother relieves rage with EFT
- A successful but involved depression case--"I don't want to tell you how well I'm doing"
- EFT resolves 12 years of postnatal depression
- What was REALLY causing Anne's depression?
- EFT student eases his wife's suicidal thoughts
- Louella: Depression, pesticides and low blood sugar
- Surrogate tapping and its effect on depression.
- Persistent EFT by Email on depression, anger and anxiety
- Cross dressing, sexuality and depression
- Long term severe depression gone in ten minutes
- Jaqui Crooks used EFT to overcome her Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
- Maggie eliminates her own depression
- A textbook depression case--a "one minute wonder" complete with belief changes
- Approaching Depression with the Tearless Trauma Technique
- After 15 years of therapy, including shock therapy, EFT helps release depression
- A case that didn't work--and some suggestions
- A first class look at using EFT for a complex case - depression, guilt, grief and abandonment
- Was it really a manic/depressive disorder?
- A mis-diagnosed manic/depressive disorder
- Depression with numerous underlying issues
- Major results for anxiety, depression and social issues from one thorough EFT session and consistent EFT "homework"
- Success with a skeptical, depressed scientist - follow up included
- Depression, low self esteem and childhood traumas
- Persistence and a challenging case - Incest, abuse, depression, anxiety attacks, nightmares and flashbacks
- A non-therapist does superb work on depression--including her own.
- Newbie uses EFT on depression, allergic reactions and more
- Hair loss and facial blemishes fade after EFT relieves important emotional issues -- Depression too!
- Adrienne, a physician
- Gary discusses depression and some new ideas
- EFT on personal depression--"I was angry at myself"
- Press Release: New Method for Depression Often Works When Nothing Else Will
- 30+ years of depression gone in 2 minutes
- EFT saves a life by rapidly resolving suicidal depression
- Depression and confusion about God
- When depression comes from a related issue
- Depression Drugs and Migraine Drugs Don't Always Do The Job
- Dr. Patricia Carrington on depression--a detailed discussion, including meds
- Depression, height phobia and claustrophobia eliminated in one session
- Depression related to guilt
- EFT instead of shock treatments?
- From depressed and suicidal ... to ... "I laugh all the time
- Depression on Death Row
- EFT Newcomer eliminates his own deep depression and anxiety disorder
- An intimate look at Depression
- Panic And Anxiety
- Getting to the core of "Mark's" anxiety
- EFT for overeating and panic attacks
- Performance anxiety at a music camp
- Gayla uses EFT for panic
- Travel Anxiety--using the Tell the Story Technique
- Febrile convulsions and related panic attacks subside--not one attack in the two years since she learned to use EFT
- Successful surrogate tapping for surgery anxiety
- Persistence and Panic Attacks - Quality results on a stubborn issue
- Husband relieves wife of major panic attack
- EFT newcomer rids himself of social anxiety
- Relief for another stress related cough
- Using EFT for panic when nobody is around
- New Method for Treating Anxiety Works When Conventional Treatments Fail
- Clearing social anxiety with EFT
- Two surrogate tapping cases: Dental anxiety and severe stomach ache
- Panic Attacks: Getting behind the thought process
- Diagnosed as a schizophrenic, Gregoire had anxiety, stress and insomnia
- Current "in your face" anxiety and stress case
- EFT makes good progress with panic, agoraphobia and feeling like a failure
- Detective work crucial in relief for panic attacks
- Combining EFT with the Inner Theater approach for panic attacks
- Testing your EFT work: Feeling trapped and panic attacks
- A Quality "How To Do It" Session for Fear and Anxiety
- Anxiety and the fear of being alone
- EFT student uses tapping to immediately calm down after a major car accident
- Medical school test anxiety--from C's and D's to A's and B's
- Success story with 10 day anxiety attack
- Sports anxiety, heat sensitivity, being away from home, loneliness, fear of insects.
- 20 year old abduction anxiety calmed with EFT
- Collapsing a client's anxiety from the 9/11 disaster--with 4 year follow-up
- Detective work provides help for an anxiety disorder
- Imagination tapping on the finger points reduces stress level to zero
- Using EFT for a client who feels out of control.
- One EFT round with Deborah's daughter relieves performance anxiety
- Surgery anxiety and EFT
- EFT helps adult learners overcome school and math anxiety
- EFT on a case of extreme separation anxiety in a dog and the importance of Core Issues for Animals
- Study Shows Simple Drug-Free Acupressure Technique Reduces Dental Anxiety
- Anxiety, eating and more
- Success in neutralizing unwanted memories without the client disclosing the content
- Newcomer uses EFT to collapse his own panic-attacks and writes letter to "Quackwatch"
- A detailed panic attack case
- Eric Robins, MD and Lisa Cox on surgery anxieties
- Severe anxiety client has his life back
- EFT Newbie resolves her own major trip anxiety
- Panic attacks and heart palpitations subside after doing EFT on dreams
- Courtroom anxiety AND anxiety about calling employers
- One EFT phone session resolves driving test anxiety -- and the benefits expand
- Panic attacks and fear of darkness
- Addressing Generalized Anxiety Disorder by aiming EFT at specific events
- Non-therapist relieves stress in the form of a temper tantrum
- EFT for panic attacks
- Who Would Have Thought That Acupressure Could Relieve Social Anxiety Better Than Drugs or Therapy?
- Daddy left me. Will my new boyfriend leave me too?
- Daily tapping for Panic Attacks
- Anxiety related to atrial fibrillation is calmed with EFT
- Performance anxiety and many aspects
- EFT brings relief for trauma, anxiety, and an overactive bladder, all in less than an hour
- Test anxiety
- Using EFT for Social Anxiety Disorder
- Surgeon Uses New Acupressure Technique to Lower Surgery Risk
- Overcoming Test Anxiety with New Drug-Free Technique: 80% Success Rate
- OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
- A grief case with many aspects
- Uncontrollable grief resolved with EFT
- Attorney helps client by using EFT for long term unresolved grief
- Freedom from grief in only 15 minutes
- Relieving grief over the death of Higgins the dog
- When certain music triggers grief and sadness
- EFT eliminates unnecessary grief emotions and softens the grieving process - includes 2 month follow up
- Using EFT for Bereavement
- EFT turns grief into beauty
- EFT brings healing to a whole family while one woman heals her grief
- Community relief from grief with EFT
- This new Widow was helped in many ways by EFT
- EFT for grief and pet loss
- Getting to important emotions by doing EFT while looking in the mirror
- Tapping through grief leads to incredible insight and relief
- EFT for pain and grief for a birth mother who wasn't allowed to see her child -- a touching story with a happy ending
- An easy grief case with an aspect that showed up later
- Imaginary tapping sends grief away
- EFT setup statements for grief
- Fresh grief and a double benefit.
- Grief changes to smiles
- EFT may be a great relief to grief-stricken nurses who lose patients
- Using EFT to improve a relationship
- EFT, One Minute Wonders and Opening to Love
- EFT by telephone smoothes out a tense family reunion
- Insights into picking up another person
- EFT heals a broken heart in rapid time
- Interesting way to use EFT & Tappy Bear for a broken heart
- Relationships, EFT and Spirituality
- Improve relationships by Tapping in the Positive
- Using EFT for relationship issues--a detailed case
- Tapping on relationship issues
- EFT resolves a 10 year heartbreak
- "I didn't like kissing my wife after she drank coffee."
- Jack improves his relationship with his grandson using surrogate EFT
- Addressing relationship and family issues by tapping on photographs
- Tapping into a state of Love
- MD introduces an innovative idea that brings relief for stubborn relationship issue
- Finding the love you want by healing the inner child
- Relationship Issue: "My husband was being a jerk"
- Using EFT to prepare for a difficult encounter
- How clearing an intense cough led to improved family relationships--an EFT two-for-one EFT benefit
- Relationships - on "Being Right"
- Instant relationship fix?
- Relationship issue: A humorous approach
- What holds you back from your lover?
- EFT is instrumental in bringing a couple back together
- Using EFT for a Broken Heart
- The Healing Power of Forgiveness
- Love, Intuition, Patience and EFT help a schizophrenic 15 year old.
- EFT for Couples
- Combining role playing with EFT for relationships and other issues
- Relationship success after finding core issue
- EFT to heal family relationships
- Using EFT on "blocking thoughts" to good relationships
- Surrogate EFT heals a broken heart for a 16 year old boy
- Retired Stanford professor fixes his wife's computer with EFT
- Shared tapping provides benefits for relationship issues
- EFT Instead of the psych ward after a relationship breaks up
- Taking relationships work to a new level--The Odd Couple
- EFT and meditation for a broken heart
- EFT for love pain
- Reframes (seeing things differently) for guilt, shame and sorrow
- Restless leg syndrome linked to guilt - 20 years of restlessness gone in 2 sessions
- How to reduce guilt via an EFT "Tapping Circle" -- keeping privacy for everyone
- The "Tapping the System" Technique
- The Rolling EFT process
- Using EFT for unnecessary guilt - Did EFT get someone's husband to cook dinner?
- How Guilt and Shame Block the Law of Attraction
- Stubborn guilt finally subsides after doing a search on our website and DVDs for ideas
- EFT and infertility
- A bout of cystitis turns out to be a bout of guilt
- Writing a letter
- New Acupressure Discovery Reduces Stress 4 Ways: 80% Success Rate
- Many Stressed Women Abandon Healthy Lifestyle Habits: Simple Acupressure Technique Offers a Solution
- To Physicians: New Discoveries in Acupressure Promise Everything From Alertness to Pain and Stress Management
- A new do-it-yourself approach to acupressure alleviates stress and, in turn neutralizes cold, flu an
- Psychotherapy Dramatically Improved By New 'Acupuncture Without Needles' Technique
- Eating Disorders
- Two Year Bulimia Problem Gets Major Assist in One Hour
- A Bulimia "one session wonder"
- Bulimia in Brazil
- "Acceptance Tapping" - A powerful EFT treatment variation for severe compulsive disorders and bulimia.
- Joe resolves his Anorexia...and more
- Love, diligence and an eating disorder
- Michal describes what it is like to be free from an eating disorder
- Anger Management
A First Class use of Surrogate EFT for Bill's anger and behavior issues
Note: This is one of 3,000 articles written prior to the updated Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tapping Tutorial™. It provides practical uses for EFT Tapping and most EFT'ers should find it very helpful. However, if your benefits are temporary or a more in-depth approach is needed, you are urged to (1) consult The Gold Standard EFT Tapping Tutorial, (2) Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT, by reading our free e-book, The Unseen Therapist, and/or (3) get help from a Certified EFT Practitioner.
Read how Nancy Morris works with "Helen" to provide surrogate EFT benefits regarding her son's traumatic birth. Many quality insights and procedures here. If you are concerned about surrogate permission issues see this article.
When Helen initially contacted me, this was her message: "I would like help regarding surrogate EFT for my son, Bill. He had a traumatic birth and has had anger and rage issues 'from the get-go'. He's a wonderful guy, with great principles and an amazing intellect, but the anger and associated personality issues are really detrimental to his life. I would try to persuade him to give EFT a try himself, but I think that would be hopeless. Could you guide me in this effort?" With such a loving attitude and clear view of her son I was delighted to work with Helen. We had 2 phone appointments, which I've outlined below.
During the first appointment Helen gave clear examples of Bill's self-defeating behavior. He pushes everyone's buttons on purpose; he tries to be outrageous to get attention; he uses anger and insulting behavior; he's easily angered and defensive; he seems to have a chip on his shoulder and always take immediate offense. Helen said again that she worries for his safety since he ignites aggression around him and toward him. Her wish was that he could feel comfortable in his skin.
As Helen laid this out she said she felt badly that as a child she couldn't protect him. He'd had a traumatic birth and had to have many medical procedures immediately after his birth. Helen could feel this guilt in her stomach, chest and throat. We did some EFT for Helen:
Even though I let Bill down, I love and forgive myself.
More aspects came up that Helen felt guilty about: not taking enough time off work when he was an infant, that Bill was an unplanned baby, that she was too old to have a baby, she was too tired. Helen's intensity was at a level of 8 on a scale of 0 to 10. We did more tapping on all of these aspects, always focusing on forgiving herself and her intensity went from 8 to 4 to ½ and finally down to 0.
Now that Helen was feeling clear, we focused on surrogate tapping on Bill's behalf. We began with:
Even though I'm Bill and I have all this anger, I love and accept myself (we said this very strong and loud).
Even though I'm Bill and I feel angry most of the time...
Even though I'm Bill and I have all this anger, I'd prefer to feel peaceful and calm.
Then we tapped around the EFT points while repeating these phrases: this anger, this anger, it's right under the surface, I have to protect myself, I love and accept myself, I need anger to keep myself safe, it's been that way since I was a kid, this anger has protected me, I love and accept how I've protected myself, I'd prefer to feel safe and peaceful, what would that be like?, feeling safe AND peaceful at the same time, no matter what, I love and accept myself as I am.
When I asked Helen where she thought Bill's anger came from if she imagined herself as he felt as a small boy, she said he wanted to be his parent's priority and knew he wasn't. We agreed that would make a child angry, even if there was very good reasons why parents had to work. So we tapped:
Even though I'm Bill and I should've come first, I didn't always and I accept that.
Even though I'm Bill and I should've come first, and I'm angry that I didn't... (tapping as if we are very young Bill)
Even though I'm Bill and I wish I'd come first all the time, I didn't always come first and I accept that.
Then we tapped around with these reminder phrases: should've come first, wish I'd always come first, wish my parents could've given me attention all the time, wish my mom could've stayed home with me, I wanted to come first, I love and accept myself.
On the next round, I added phrases about loving and forgiving:
Even though I'm Bill and I should've come first, I didn't always, and I love and accept my parents and appreciate the care they gave me.
Even though I'm Bill and I should've come first, I forgive my parents.
Even though I'm Bill and I should've come first, I didn't always, I accept that and I know my parents did the best they could given who they were at the time.
Then we tapped around with these reminder phrases: wish I'd always come first, I love and forgive my Mom, wish my parents could've given me attention all the time, I understand their difficulties at the time, wish my Mom could've stayed home with me, All kids want that and I accept that she couldn't, I wanted to come first, I love and accept myself, their choices had nothing to do with my value, I know that they loved me, I love and forgive all of us, I'm grateful for the upbringing they gave me and how much they love me even today. This ended our first session.
During our next appointment, Helen and I focused on identifying the attributes that she would want her son to enjoy. Helen came up with: optimism, thinking before speaking, empathy, compassion, kindness, confidence, initiative, ability to handle rejection. When I asked why she wanted these for him she replied it was "so he'll feel happier and stay safe". We did a great deal of tapping, both of us pretending once again that we were Bill and contrasting the "usual" feelings Bill had to a more positive one. For example:
Even though I'm Bill and I feel full of sadness, I love and accept myself (we said this very strong and loud) and I'd prefer to feel optimistic. Then we'd tap around alternating between "sad" and "optimistic".
We continued with setup phrases and reminder phrases that included all Bill's difficult feelings and behaviors (rage, frustration, sarcasm, laziness, procrastination, anger) and balancing them with their opposite. Often we would say in the midst of the surrogate tapping, as if we were Bill, "I wonder how that would feel?" or "I wonder how people would react toward me?" or "I wonder what life would feel like?"
About a year later I received this note from Helen. (I've shortened it and changed some things to make it more anonymous, but they are her words otherwise, and Bill's life!)
"Hi, Nancy, I just sent an email to a friend about EFT and my work with you and its results. I realized that I should update you on those results as well. Bill has done a complete turn-around. Totally on his own initiative he...
- Signed up for German language lessons at a community college in the town where he was in college,
- He's worked to improve his grades
- Bought a GMAT study guide that weighed about 10 pounds and plugged his way completely through it over his school break
- Made a 730 on the GMAT
- Completed applications to a number of universities for admission to their masters of science programs
- Will begin a very high ranked masters of science program in the summer and the school gave him a scholarship for which he did not even apply
- He is eating for health and to lose weight
- He works out every day
- He is affable and a pleasure to be around"
It's a total turn around. Is it all attributable to EFT? Maybe not; I certainly can't prove that it is. But might EFT have been the catalyst, at least. I believe so. When I began to catalogue the dramatic changes in his behavior, when nothing had worked in the past, my belief in the efficacy of EFT was greatly reinforced. Bill has really found himself. He is grounded, centered, and has integrity. The obvious thing is that this is not a normal maturation process but a sudden and abrupt change to a whole new direction."
Gary, maybe EFT is another way to "send good energy" to someone or to "pray" for someone. who knows? I'm just glad it seems to work!
Nancy Morris, EFTCert-I
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