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Other Emotional Issues

Anger Management

EFT for deep seated anger

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.

Hi Everyone,

Just about everyone experiences anger and, when active, it robs us of our personal peace. It can cause relationship challenges, diseases and a long list of other problems. Fortunately, EFT can effectively neutralize it and thus allow peace to replace the turmoil. Scout Wilkins shows us how she used EFT for herself in this regard.

Hugs, Gary

By Scout Wilkins


I've been following this newsletter for years now, and am so thankful to you and to everyone who has written in with great suggestions and ideas. This morning, I thought I would take my turn. I have been using EFT on myself and with clients for several years, and find it breathtakingly effective - but never more so than recently.

Generally, I consider myself a pretty grounded, solid person. I am in a situation which is tweaking one of my oldest, deepest, angriest buttons.  It's one of those times when the anger I am feeling is so out of proportion to the current event that there is NO question that I'm bringing up ancient stuff - stuff which I know has deeply impacted me all my life. Without EFT, I have no doubt that I'd either be swirling in anger, unable to move through it and let it go - or, as is more my pattern, slipping into depression because of suppressing the anger.

Instead, every time in the past three days that the anger has surfaced, I have stepped right into it, and tapped my way through it. When I started to hear those angry thoughts, and noticed even the tiniest bit of anger in my body, I have stopped what I am doing, sat in a chair and tapped to make the emotion stronger, going right into it to pull it out by its roots. Happily, I have been able to be in a private setting where I could let it all out.

The issue is that a person at a distance, whose house I am caretaking, is exerting control over my living situation in a way that is taking me right back to childhood issues of feeling discounted and controlled. The limiting belief that I ended up with was that what I want doesn't matter. So - the fact that I was in this situation of being discounted and controlled opened up the big one. I began with this setup:

Even though I am so angry at Dorothy for trying to control me in this situation…

Even though Dorothy is asking me to live in a way that makes this not feel like my home…

Even though Dorothy is trying to push her way of living over on me, and I want to live in the exact opposite way…

I have gotten very comfortable with following whatever language comes up in the moment, so I watched my words with interest as the problem morphed quickly from "This is not what we agreed to" through "You can't tell me what to do," into a series of unprintable comments, and finally came out on the other side as "You can't control me." By far, most of the time was spent on my top of the head point, and at times, on that point, I recognized that I had completely stopped breathing and my body was completely rigid. It was interesting to note that the intensity dropped when I moved to other points, but returned to a peak when I got back to my head.

By tapping into it, I immersed myself for the time it took - which I am happy to report was only about five or ten minutes at any single sitting - in the biggest, boldest, scream-out-loud strongest anger I've ever felt.  Eventually, of course, I came each time to that deep sigh which comes with the release of emotion, and collapsed into the chair.

GC COMMENT: EFT can often be done more gently where the screaming rage may not be necessary. Our Tearless Trauma Technique is one method for doing this. Also, EFT using on the original (usually childhood) specific events underlying the anger is often an efficient and longer lasting option.

When the anger first surfaced, it came in at a 10 on a scale of 0 to 10, like a ton of bricks.

The highest possible rating I can imagine. I tapped until it was a zero. Subsequent times, I tapped whenever the feeling arose - which was usually at least a 7 or 8 out of 10. This was a deeply rooted problem. Each time I tapped, I took it to a zero. Today, I am happy to report that it is remaining at zero. I did basic, shortcut EFT.

It's been physically exhausting in the moment, and exhilarating overall, as I have truly felt the release of this old, old anger.

THANK YOU GARY CRAIG and everyone who has contributed to this thread, all these years.

Scout Wilkins


Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.