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Helping mother and her unborn baby with EFT

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Baerbel Froehlin does a first class job in this article of allowing her intuition to find an important core issue. Note how she lets her EFT language flow until the important issue shows up. This is the mark of a truly experienced EFT'er. For those interested, this method of "Getting yourself out of the way" is demonstrated profusely on our DVD set entitled EFT - Beyond the Basics (formerly Steps Toward Becoming the Ultimate Therapist) and is used throughout most of the training DVDs that came after that.


Baerbel Froehlin, CHt./HypnoCoach, EFT-ADV

The client I worked with in this case is a young woman who became pregnant "by accident" as they say in Germany. She had been living with the father of her unborn child for a while without having the intention to get married. This is very common in Germany, and more often the case as is getting married before moving in with each other.

Gina (not her real name) started to feel physically ill right from the start of her pregnancy. Then in her third month her days were filled with vomiting, sleeping, vomiting again and falling back into bed, completely exhausted. She was unable to keep any food down; she had given up eating and lost weight rapidly. Whenever she tried anything at all it would come up right away, leaving her in a very uncomfortable state. She was extremely weak physically. Her doctor was very concerned and talked about having her stay in the hospital where they would feed her through an IV. She already was put on medication that was supposed to stop the vomiting - which it didn't. This had gone on for weeks when she contacted me for a phone session.

When I asked her how she felt about having this tiny little baby inside her she said: "I think the baby must feel like being on a terrible rollercoaster, moving all around so violently while I am sick and throwing up." Gina also mentioned that "the baby is too much of a responsibility and I don't really want it. It is going to change my life completely and I am not ready for that." She told me that she had always wanted to be independent; being pregnant for her meant that she was "tied down", totally dependent on what it would do to her, not able to do the things she wanted to do whenever she felt like it.

Even though I don't like to be dependent .....
Even though that freaks me out ......
Even though all my life I have avoided to be tied down in any way ........
I do accept myself and my tiny baby inside....

Even though I am scared out of my mind ..... I don't want to be responsible for another person ....I am concerned enough with myself .... and this other person would be a tiny baby ... so completely dependent on me ... scares the hell out of me ..... makes me vomit all the time ....

every single thought of it makes me go again .... vomiting over and over ..... trying to get my inside out .... trying to make this whole thing go away ....

trying so hard to get over it ..... trying so hard to let go of it ..... trying so hard to disconnect .... but it doesn't work ......

I asked her to imagine the tiny baby inside; to picture the forces inside her when she had to throw up. I pointed out to her what a fighter this little one seemed to be; no food and all this holding on! We had a giggle about that.

Even though I can't get out of my responsibility ..... no matter how much I vomit ... this tiny little being is holding on to me .... having one wild ride after the other ... holding on for life .... holding on to me ... it's mother .... holding on to stay with me ... holding on to life..... so small and so determined .... with no food to grow on ..... almost starving ....

I now choose to acknowledge .... that my baby is a fighter .... this baby demands my respect .... and my admiration ..... most of all ... I feel I need to support it ... to give it a chance .... to feed it .... as well as I can .... and I will .....

Then Gina told me: "When I was growing up my Mom always took away my key so I could not come and go the way I wanted to. When I was home late she hit me with a wooden spoon. I felt so at her mercy and so very helpless! I was not allowed to make any decisions at all. My parents decided for me. They had no clue who I was as a person. I even told my Mom: Hit me until I'm dead; that's okay with me. Why don't you just kill me? I don't want to live with all these restrictions. At that time I promised myself I would never again be dependent on anyone!"

There it was.

Gina reported that her esophagus hurt a lot as she talked. I asked her to imagine what it would look like inside the esophagus. She described it like this: "It feels very restricted, narrow and most of all violated. I have a hard time breathing. Each time I have to vomit it gets worse. My esophagus feels the same way I feel. It has no influence on what happens to it; just has to suffer and accept everything that happens! "

Here is some of what we tapped on:

Even though my esophagus feels violated .... just like me .... has no saying in what happens ..... just like me...
I choose to accept the fact that because I'm pregnant my body is changing.... hormones are soaring ....Mother Nature does all that to me without asking ... just like Mom did then ... and I feel violated again .... I do understand that now!

Even though I feel have no control .... hormones are doing what they want ... I now choose to open up my heart for my baby ... my baby waits for my help .... just like I waited for help when Mom hit me .... but nobody came to rescue me

my baby needs me .... real bad .... to feed it .... to protect it .... to make it feel safe .... no matter what .... so it can start growing ... and living .... in the best possible way ... and only I can provide that .... all of it

Even though my baby had to suffer so much until now .... all those wild rollercoaster rides .... I feel ready now ... to take over control .... to stop vomiting ... I'm sick and tired of it any way .... I want my life back ....

that's why I now choose to do whatever possible .... to calm down .... to make my body calm down .... so the baby will be stabilized ....

I now choose to let this feeling in .... that's been waiting for a while .... deep down inside of me .... a sweet loving feeling for my baby .... that precious brave little baby ..... waiting for me to make it feel safe .... and happy

Even though I need to control this throwing-up ..... too much for the baby ..... too many wild rides .... and no food ....
I now choose to take over .... for both of us .... that feels very good!
I now choose .... to spare the baby any more convulsions ..... I am going to stop vomiting ..... very soon now ....
and I choose to look forward to the time when I feel better ..... no vomiting .... baby safe and growing ..... starting to eat again .... with a good appetite .... my baby will love that!

During our next session a few days later Gina told me she had seen the baby on ultrasound and was stunned by how tiny it was. She had reduced her vomiting to about twice a day and was eating fully and with a good appetite. She told me she imagined the baby catching the food that came down through her now improved esophagus. Gina had even started to go outside for walks, feeling much better each time. She told me that she wished the baby were born already; she was looking forward to having it.

Gina is now late in her seventh month of pregnancy. She just got married to the man who is the father of her unborn baby. The baby obviously is growing at a healthy rate and Mom and Baby are feeling great - thanks to EFT!

Don't you just love it??? I do.

Baerbel Froehlin, CHt./HypnoCoach, EFT-ADV


Follow-up

Hi Gary,

As I noticed my article ran once again in your newsletter today it felt like I needed to give you an update on how this baby developed so far.

The unborn baby girl had shown quite some strong will to survive. No matter how much and how long its mom had starved it by not eating or keeping food down at all during many months of her pregnancy, this baby made it into 9 pounds and some when it was born!

This strong survivor also had the umbilical cord twice around its neck and was saved just about in the last moment from being strangled. As soon as the baby girl was born she started drinking and has not stopped ever since. Her mom breast feeds her around the clock, she is very busy doing that almost constantly. Mom has no life at all now besides feeding her daughter CONSTANTLY! So much about being independent...

Should there be a moment when this baby girl does not get enough food or fed fast enough, she will scream so deafening loud that everybody around drops everything to just get any food into her mouth. Red like a tomato, screaming from the top of her lungs she always makes sure that she'll never again be without food.

I am looking forward to watching her as she grows up. This now 6-months old super baby was "saved by EFT" and has already shown enormous abilities to survive the odds, to thrive and to hold on to anything that is possible to get, no matter what.

With much love and a giggle .......

Baerbel

FOR MORE EFT HELP ...

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