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Other Emotional Issues

Anger Management

EFT for anger helps both Ann and her angry husband--note the surrogate approach

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.

Hi Everyone,

Anne McKinley gives us two practical anger cases where EFT saved the day. She says, "As my husband was ranting (I sensed about a 9 out of 10 level), I imagined I was tapping on him. I did not use any set up statements, just jumped right in with the mental tapping..."

Hugs, Gary

By Ann McKinley

Hi Gary,

I have two incidents of dealing with anger that I believe will be of benefit to your readers.

I have never dealt with conflict or anger very well but every once in a while I am confronted with it. One evening my husband was very angry about our teenage son's behavior (who is actually a great kid that does something exasperating every so often) and he insisted on expressing his anger to me verbally. Usually when this happens, I get tied up in knots feeling very defensive and protective (my anxiety level would be an 8 on a scale of 0 to 10).

This time I decided on a different tactic. As my husband was ranting (I sensed about a 9 out of 10 level), I imagined I was tapping on him. I did not use any set up statements, just jumped right in with the mental tapping starting with his inner eyebrow, then the side of the eye, under his eye and all the basic upper body points, no finger points. He was saying all the words, I just imagined I was tapping on him.

Before long I noticed my husband changed what he was mad about and was off on another topic that angered him and that did not have anything to do with our son. I kept up my imaginary tapping. My husband went through five different issues or shifts before he settled down and was through. And myself? I noticed I was a lot calmer and did not feel scared and tied up in knots like I always did at such times. I was actually able to be more present for him during the episode. I really think the EFT benefited both of us.

There was another time when my husband asked for my help in dealing with his anger around a personal issue that had come up at our church. When I first checked in with him, he was livid and the anger was a definite 10 out of 10. I worked two rounds of the short routine from the inner eyebrow to under the arm on feeling intense anger, being livid and being unjustly treated. After the two rounds I checked back with him. He said it was gone. I was skeptical that just two rounds would eliminate it so I asked a few more questions to be sure and he said he could feel where the anger had been but it felt like there was an empty hole there now. The anger never came back and he was able to move past that issue by seeing it as being the other person's problem and feeling sorry for them.

Ann McKinley


Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.