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Children

General

Lazy teen finds new way to study - adding the right ingredients

EFt Tapping Outdated ImageNote: This is one of 3,000 articles written prior to the updated Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tapping Tutorial™. As a result, it is likely outdated. It provides practical uses for EFT Tapping but you should also explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT, by reading our free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™, and/or get help from a Certified EFT Practitioner.

Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.

Hi Everyone,

While applying EFT, Deborah Miller from Mexico brings together some useful metaphors to help this young student. In a personal note to me, Deborah says, "How does one motivate a teenager to study especially when the subject at hand doesn't appear to relate to the career the teens wants? Well, I mixed the right ingredients and images to blend the two. See if you like the ingredients and results."

Hugs, Gary


By Deborah Miller, Ph.D.

Gary,

Francisca (not her real name) is a teenager. Her parents brought her to see me because they worried about her grades being low. She is very motivated when it comes to sports, especially tennis, but hardly ever studies. She does the minimum schoolwork possible and studies for her exams only the night before them. Of course, she is not doing well in school.

She is bright but not motivated to study. She wants to be a chef and doesn't understand how studying history could have any effect on her ability to be a chef. We talked about how even if these things aren't directly related, having poor grades may affect her ability to get into her school of choice. We discussed the possibility that knowing history in relation to foods could be of help to her. We began to tap on these topics.

I find school boring; history is boring; the way it is taught is boring.

I don't want to memorize all those names, places and dates.

Who needs it anyway?

How does that relate to being a chef?

I choose to relate what I love, cooking, to history.

I choose to think of the Spanish invading Mexico as ingredients.

The Spanish are chilies with their mouths open devouring the poor Mexicans in the pueblos, and they are like cheese.

Now that is easy to remember.

I can add all the ingredients I need to remember all the places, people and dates too.

This makes studying history much more fun.

She could imagine studying history now because she had a way to relate it to something she enjoys, cooking. I checked how she felt about her parents pestering her to study. She understands that they want her to do well, but she feels bad that they are after her day after day to study. I asked her what that feeling looked like as a color or form and where it was located. She said black and it was in her heart. We tapped:

I'm a great young lady even if I am lazy when it comes to studying history.

I don't get why it is important.

I don't feel good when my parents are after me every night about studying.

It makes me feel bad.

It makes me feel that they don't believe I'm smart.

Maybe I'm not really smart.

Maybe I'm not good enough.

They don't believe in me.

Tears came to her eyes as we tapped on this. Even though the whole time she was in my office she was acting as if everything is ok, she felt deeply hurt because she wanted her parents to be proud of her and they weren't proud of her grades.

I feel sad.

I feel like I'm not worthy.

I'm not good enough.

Yet, I'm smart.

I love to cook.

I'm good at it.

Why do I need to study history?

I am a divine young woman.

I choose to get rid of the black in my heart.

I cook it out with some ingredients.

I choose to use cheese, white cheese, to get rid of the black.

The black turned gray so we continued by adding more cheese until it was white. It only took another round.

I asked again to think about how she feels when her parents pester her about studying. She said fine. Now she knows how to change things, how to study in a different way, how to add the right ingredients to feel good, to remember things, to make changes, and it relates to what she wants to do in her career, be a chef.

I am so pleased for her. She found a new way to relate what she loves, cooking, to school and her homework. She found a way to be creative and independently choose to do well no matter how a subject was being taught to her. She found her a way to be proud of herself and make her parents proud too. All it takes is the right ingredients and she has them.

Deborah

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