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Articles & Ideas


A lesson in "letting go"

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

This brief story by Alan Morison from the UK provides a simple alternative to forgiveness that can be very helpful for some clients.

By Alan Morison

Hi Gary,

Your articles on Forgiveness are all so very relevant. That alone is probably the biggest impediment to progress, but as Pat Carrington says, forgiving seems an abstract kind of concept to deal with and therefore not easy to do. While she uses 'understanding' of the problem, I like to use the phrase "Letting Go' which I used with a client just recently to great effect.

Jay had been sexually abused as a child by her brother and, although her family knew about the situation, she had done nothing to talk it out, just buried it, thinking that was the way to deal with it; simply ignore it.

As years went on Jay relied on the company of her dog to help her as she would talk to it if she needed to express her feelings. She was devastated when the dog died, however, as she felt she had killed it herself because it had to be put down. She stopped sexual relations with her husband and although he knew about her abuse he didn't understand what she was feeling, finally saying she would have to leave if she was going to continue withholding from him. That huge shock to her system prompted her to begin her studies in health care as an "I'll show them" reaction but gradually she found she could not cope with the demands on her as her emotional system became more and more under strain.

When she came to me for help we tapped on all these issues, including the behaviour and death of her father. It was obvious that genuine progress was being made, but every issue (including every aspect) refused to zero out, hovering around a 1 or maybe a 2.

It became clear to me that she was in fact holding on to these issues and we tapped next for "Even though I have this fear of letting go and I don't know how I'll feel afterwards." That produced positive results but no zero. I then asked her if this fear was producing a 'gap' within her. She affirmed, astonished that I knew, rubbing her upper abdomen, so we tapped for "Even though I have this gap" which made her feel a lot happier. Still no zero, although now no fear of letting go, but close.

I then asked her if she felt she could let go of her issues and she shook her head no. The next round of tapping, "Even though I can't let go..." was the trigger. As soon as we had got to the UA point she released everything that had steadfastly stuck at a 1 or 2. She could not believe how amazing she felt (I got a huge hug as a result). On testing she looked back at all the events and did not feel any of them affected her any more. And she then said "And I forgive my brother as well."

Forgiving may be hard to do, but letting go may well be the key to making it that bit easier.

Best wishes

Alan Morison


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